[润色成篇]
| 初级范文 | 高分范文 |
| --- | --- |
| Dear Tom,
How is everything going with you? Now I'm writing to tell you something about my summer holiday resolutions.
①Firstly, I am going to have a good rest to relax myself. I will listen to music or watch some TV shows. Secondly, reading will be an important part of my holiday. ②I'm going to read some storybooks and science books. Thirdly, I plan to work as a volunteer in the community library to help children read. Finally, I am going to learn to swim. ③Because swimming is a good way to keep healthy. It also helps us feel cool during the hot summer.
All in all, I hope I'll have a meaningful and colourful summer holiday.
Yours,
Zhang Wei | Dear Tom,
How is everything going with you? Now I'm writing to tell you something about my summer holiday resolutions.
①First of all, I plan to have a good rest to relax myself
All in all, I hope I'll have a meaningful and colourful summer holiday.
Yours,
Zhang Wei |
名师指导:
一、高分范文中,①使用 by doing 结构升格,简化了句式结构;②使用 both...and 结构和动词不定式作目的状语升格,使表述更紧凑,内容表达更丰富;③not only...but also 高级词汇的使用使文章更有层次感。
二、两篇范文均围绕"给 Tom 写信分享暑假计划"这一核心主题展开,都采用了"问候→点明主旨→分点阐述计划→总结期望"的书信结构。条理清晰,内容完整覆盖题目要点,且适当增加细节让行文更连贯。
| 初级范文 | 高分范文 |
| --- | --- |
| Dear Tom,
How is everything going with you? Now I'm writing to tell you something about my summer holiday resolutions.
①Firstly, I am going to have a good rest to relax myself. I will listen to music or watch some TV shows. Secondly, reading will be an important part of my holiday. ②I'm going to read some storybooks and science books. Thirdly, I plan to work as a volunteer in the community library to help children read. Finally, I am going to learn to swim. ③Because swimming is a good way to keep healthy. It also helps us feel cool during the hot summer.
All in all, I hope I'll have a meaningful and colourful summer holiday.
Yours,
Zhang Wei | Dear Tom,
How is everything going with you? Now I'm writing to tell you something about my summer holiday resolutions.
①First of all, I plan to have a good rest to relax myself
by listening to music or watching some TV shows
(使用 by doing 结构升格). Besides, reading will be an important part of my holiday. ②I'm going to read both classic literature and science books in order to learn more. What's more, I plan to work as a volunteer in the community library to help children read. Finally, I am going to learn to swim. ③Because swimming is not only a good way to keep healthy, but it also helps us feel cool during the hot summer.All in all, I hope I'll have a meaningful and colourful summer holiday.
Yours,
Zhang Wei |
名师指导:
一、高分范文中,①使用 by doing 结构升格,简化了句式结构;②使用 both...and 结构和动词不定式作目的状语升格,使表述更紧凑,内容表达更丰富;③not only...but also 高级词汇的使用使文章更有层次感。
二、两篇范文均围绕"给 Tom 写信分享暑假计划"这一核心主题展开,都采用了"问候→点明主旨→分点阐述计划→总结期望"的书信结构。条理清晰,内容完整覆盖题目要点,且适当增加细节让行文更连贯。
答案：① by listening to music or watching some TV shows
小试身手
2027年即将到来，在运动健康、提升学业、培养爱好等方面你一定有一些新年计划吧？你校英文广播站正在开展以“我的新年决心”为主题的征文活动。请你根据下面图示信息和要求，结合自身实际，写一篇英语征文。80—120词，标题和开头已给出，不计入总词数。
书写区域 Good writing makes your article better.
My New Year’s Resolutions
The new year is coming. It’s a good time to make resolutions.
(请把作文写到自己的练习本上吧！)
2027年即将到来，在运动健康、提升学业、培养爱好等方面你一定有一些新年计划吧？你校英文广播站正在开展以“我的新年决心”为主题的征文活动。请你根据下面图示信息和要求，结合自身实际，写一篇英语征文。80—120词，标题和开头已给出，不计入总词数。
书写区域 Good writing makes your article better.
My New Year’s Resolutions
The new year is coming. It’s a good time to make resolutions.
I'm glad to share my New Year's resolutions with you.
First, I am going to work hard at school. I am going to listen to the teachers in class, take notes and do homework carefully to get good grades. Second, I am going to get lots of exercise like running and playing basketball because I want to improve my health. I also plan to eat more fruit and vegetables and less junk food to keep fit. What's more, I am going to take up playing the guitar. I am going to help with housework at home. I think I should give up my bad habits such as being late for school.
I think if I do these, I will meet a better myself in the new year.
(请把作文写到自己的练习本上吧！)
答案：小试身手
写作指导与评价请扫描“详解详析二维码”
One possible version:
My New Year's Resolutions
The new year is coming. It's a good time to make resolutions. I'm glad to share my New Year's resolutions with you.
First, I am going to work hard at school. I am going to listen to the teachers in class, take notes and do homework carefully to get good grades. Second, I am going to get lots of exercise like running and playing basketball because I want to improve my health. I also plan to eat more fruit and vegetables and less junk food to keep fit. What's more, I am going to take up playing the guitar. I am going to help with housework at home. I think I should give up my bad habits such as being late for school.
I think if I do these, I will meet a better myself in the new year.
写作指导与评价请扫描“详解详析二维码”
One possible version:
My New Year's Resolutions
The new year is coming. It's a good time to make resolutions. I'm glad to share my New Year's resolutions with you.
First, I am going to work hard at school. I am going to listen to the teachers in class, take notes and do homework carefully to get good grades. Second, I am going to get lots of exercise like running and playing basketball because I want to improve my health. I also plan to eat more fruit and vegetables and less junk food to keep fit. What's more, I am going to take up playing the guitar. I am going to help with housework at home. I think I should give up my bad habits such as being late for school.
I think if I do these, I will meet a better myself in the new year.