$ (1)$证明:∵$DE\perp AB,$∴$∠DEA = ∠DEB = 90°$
∵$M$为$BD$的中点,∴$EM = BM=\frac 12DB$
同理,得$CM = BM = \frac 12DB,$∴$CM = EM$
$ (3)$证明:连接$AM$
由$(1)$得$∠DEA = 90°,$$CM = EM,$且$\triangle DAE≌\triangle CEM$
∴$AE = EM = CM = DE = DM = BM,$$∠DEA = ∠CME = 90°$
∴$\triangle ADE$是等腰直角三角形,$\triangle DEM$是等边三角形
∴$∠DEM = ∠DME = 60°,$∴$∠FEM = 90°-∠DEM = 30°$
∵$AE = EM,$$∠FEM = ∠EAM + ∠EMA$
∴$∠EAM = ∠EMA = 15°$
∴$∠AMC = ∠CME - ∠EMA = 75°$
∵$∠CME = 90°,$$∠DME = 60°$
∴$∠DMC = 90°-∠DME = 30°$
∵$CM = DM = BM,$$∠DMC = ∠MCB + ∠MBC$
∴$∠MCB = ∠MBC = 15°$
∴$∠MDC = ∠MCD = ∠ACB - ∠MCB = 75°$
∴$∠AMC = ∠MCD,$∴$AC = AM$
∵$N$为$CM$的中点,∴$AN\perp CM$
∴$∠ANM = 90°,$即$∠ANM + ∠CME = 180°$
∴$AN// EM$