解:
$ (1) $因为点$P(m,n)$为线段$CD$上一点,
$S_{△ COP}+S_{△ DOP}$
$=S_{△ COD},$
$ S_{△ COP}=\frac {1}{2}×OC×m$
$=\frac {1}{2}×4×m,$
$S_{△ DOP}=\frac {1}{2}×OD×n$
$=\frac {1}{2}×6×n,$
$S_{△ COD}=\frac {1}{2}×OC×OD$
$=\frac {1}{2}×4×6$
$=12,$
所以:
$ \begin {aligned}\frac {1}{2}×4m+\frac {1}{2}×6n&=12\\2m+3n&=12\\m &=-\frac {3}{2}n+6\end {aligned}$
$ $即$m $与$n$的数量关系为$2m+3n=12$
$($或$m=-\frac {3}{2}n+6)。$
$ (2) $当$a=-2$时,$A(-2,0),$$D(6,0),$
$ $因为点$B$是线段$AD$的中点,
所以$B$点坐标为$(\frac {-2+6}{2},0)=(2,0),$
$ S_{△ ABC}=\frac {1}{2}×AB×OC$
$=\frac {1}{2}×[2-(-2)]×4$
$=\frac {1}{2}×4×4$
$=8,$
$ $四边形$AOPC$的面积
$=S_{△ AOC}+S_{△ COP}$
$=\frac {1}{2}×2×4+\frac {1}{2}×4×m$
$=4+2m,$
$ $由题意$4+2m=8,$解得$m=2。$
$ (3) $解方程组$\begin {cases}2a+3b+m=0\\3a+2b+m=-5\end {cases},$
用第二个方程减去第一个方程:
$ \begin {aligned}3a+2b+m-(2a+3b+m)&=-5-0\\a -b&=-5\\b -a&=5\end {aligned}$
$ $由$(1)$知$2m+3n=12,$
则$n=\frac {12-2m}{3}=-\frac {2}{3}m+4,$
$ S_{△ ABP}=\frac {1}{2}×AB×n$
$=\frac {1}{2}×5×(-\frac {2}{3}m+4)$
$=-\frac {5}{3}m+10,$
$ $由题意$-\frac {5}{3}m+10<5,$
$ \begin {aligned}\frac {5}{3}m&<-5\\m &>3\end {aligned}$
$ $又因为点$P $在线段$CD$上$($不与$C、$$D$重合$),$
所以$0<m<6,$
综上,$m $的取值范围是$3<m<6。$